Use Your Head To Avoid Receiving The Technological Darwin Award

Everyone knows about the Darwin Awards. This is not a real award program. The term actually refers to people who have made literally fatally stupid mistakes thus bringing the law of natural selection into play. In our humble opinion, the Darwin Awards should not just be humorously awarded to people who have bitten the dust due to irreversible error.

A technological version should also be awarded to people who inflict mortal damage on technology such as mobile phones, tablets, iPads and laptops. In this article, we will give a few examples of well-deserved Darwin Awards in the field of technology.

Internet Rage, Drunken Net Surfing And Sheer Idiocy Are At The Bottom Of Many Cases Of Laptop Abuse

People who destroy their laptops have all kinds of interesting stories to tell about this phenomenon. Most of them involve negative attitude, consumption of alcohol and/or unlikely and bizarre accidents. Here are just a few of the many ways you can destroy your mobile technology and win the Technological Darwin Award.

Physical Rage Does Not Affect Your Internet Frenemies

Many people deserve the Technological Darwin Award for succumbing to rage while surfing the net. They find out about an unfaithful spouse or boyfriend/girlfriend on Facebook, learn that their best friend is talking trash behind their back, or are enraged by some other virtual insult and end up assaulting the laptop. This can result in a broken screen, a laptop suffering from keyboard and screen separation, or any number of examples of irreparable damage.

The main thing to learn here, is that no matter how badly you treat your laptop, your lying, cheating friends and relations will not be harmed. It’s really best to keep a lid on your emotions and apply your energy to plotting and scheming behind the scenes, instead.

Drinking & Surfing Can Win You The Technological Darwin Award

Just as drunk dialing is never a good idea, drunk web surfing is destined for doom. Aside from the fact that you are bound to make bad decisions that can at least embarrass you and at worst cause you problems with identity theft or even personal physical danger, you are very likely to damage your computer when surfing under the influence.

If you have been drinking heavily, you are highly likely to toss the contents of your stomach right onto your keyboard. This will result in embarrassment, expensive repairs or even the necessity of replacing your laptop.

Irresponsible Pet Owners Reap What They Sow

If you have a non-neutered male dog and you leave your laptop on the floor, you can expect your dog to claim it as his own by marking it (if you know what I mean). Much like tossing the contents of your stomach onto your keyboard, this can result in costly repairs or ruin. Likewise, if you have an untamed dog who loves to chew and you fail to contain your dog and secure your laptop, tablet, mobile phone (or just about anything else) you can count on irreparable damage and significant expense.

Sheer Stupidity Is The Enemy Of Technology

People who believe their laptop, tablet or other delicate technological marvel can be used for anything other than its intended purpose are courting disaster. It should go without saying that you cannot lay your device on top of a footstool and then rest your feet on it, yet many deserving Darwin Award hopefuls have done just that. Likewise, you should not use your (rather expensive) closed device as a tray to hold your lunch on your lap. Excessive weight will buckle and break your screen. Accidental spills can destroy your device. Use your head (and a cheap plastic tray intended for the purpose of holding your lunch)!

Put A Lid On It!

Accidental spills are such a common cause of device death, they deserve to be mentioned multiple times. No matter where you are or what you are doing with your laptop or other device, keep a lid on your soda, coffee or other beverage. If it tips over and pours out on your keyboard it can destroy your electronic circuitry. If you have a lid on your drink, a few drops may spill, but your device is unlikely to suffer irreparable damage.

Distraction Destroys!

You’re addicted to online gaming, you’re a real pro, you live to game. When you finish up a victorious round of gaming, you toss your ear-buds onto the keyboard, clap your laptop shut and break your screen. Very smart. Pay attention to what you are doing when using your laptop and accessories. Careless handling can send your investment and your enjoyment down the drain and earn you the technological Darwin Award.

Seek Expert Advice

You’d be amazed by how many stupid mistakes technological experts can set right. Get to know the repair specialists at your local computer shop, a good repair shop should offer all the services listed here,¬†you will now have a connection when you inevitably need to have something repaired on your laptop, phone, tablet and other mobile technology. Spare yourself the embarrassment of having your local experts award you the Technological Darwin Award behind your back by remembering the information presented here and using some common sense.

It’s a brave new world, but some old advice holds true: An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure. Take care of your mobile technology to spare yourself embarrassment and expense.


Amy Rice writes about laptop repairs, when not writing she goes horse riding with her daughter.